Let’s be honest: We Viennese love our grumpiness. But internationally, that comes across as a bit brusque. In global expat rankings, we regularly land at the bottom when it comes to welcoming culture. That’s over now. An alliance of all Viennese schools is taking action and introducing a new mandatory subject effective today (April 1).
Math, German, and… politeness?
From elementary school through high school graduation, “Proactive Friendliness” is now on the curriculum. The goal is clearly defined: Austria, especially Vienna, wants to move away from the image of a grumpy Alpine republic.
The curricula include modules such as “Smiling Under Pressure,” “Responding Directly Without Sarcasm,” and, particularly tough for us, “Avoiding the Viennese Wit in Customer Interaction.”
Grades for a kind word
Pilot projects are even in the works for adults: Vienna public transit drivers and city officials are to learn in crash courses how to say “Good morning” without it sounding like a threat. Negotiations with the unions are already in full swing to ensure the initiative is implemented across the board.
When the change will take effect
The first report cards featuring the new grade will be handed out as early as June. The hope is that this will propel the city into the top 10 of the world’s most livable— and, above all , friendliest—cities.
Did reading this make you a little annoyed or scratch your head in disbelief?
Don’t worry, you can keep your grumpiness. The whole thing was, of course, an April Fool’s joke!🐣 After all, Vienna without a bit of unfriendliness would be like a Sachertorte without whipped cream. Just not the real thing!
